Seen plentiful times on Facebook, courtesy of Daveswordsofwisdom dot com:
“I’m not hot or gorgeous. I don’t have an amazing figure or a flat stomach. I’m far from being considered a model but, I’m me. I eat food, I have curves, I have more fat than I should, I have scars, I have a history. Some people love me, some like me, some hate me. I have done good, I have done bad. I love my PJ’s and I go without makeup. I’m random and crazy. I don’t pretend to be someone I’m not. I am who I am, you can love me or not. I won’t change!! And if I love you, I do it with my heart!! I make no apologies for the way I am. Ladies, please SHARE this as on your wall if you are proud of who you are!”
I’m sure someone has created a version for men . . .
What I find challenging about this piece of writing is the phrase “I won’t change!!”
Really?
You are constantly changing. Your body ages. Cells die. New ones are created. When you wake you have new experiences and ultimately you have thousands of choices to make as a result of those experiences. With those choices comes the opportunity to change. If you adamantly insist “I won’t change”, you deny yourself your own ability to improve and evolve beyond your limitations.
I’m sure most people post this piece because they feel it’s empowering. It’s a message that the person accepts who they are, with all their imperfections. From my perspective there is a potential to ignore the truth that the imperfections one accepts may be harmful to one’s self or to others.
I am not advocating obsessing about achieving an illusory state of perfection. I am acknowledging the existence of change and evolution. I am advocating people consider making beneficial changes to their perspectives and behaviour. To me, messages like the above are more limiting than empowering. They convey the falsehood that everything about you is fine exactly the way it is when the reality is everyone can change and choose to improve.
This message encourages people to settle for the way things are, that we don’t need to change or improve and by extension that everything around us is fine “as is”. From my perspective it is not a benign or beneficial message and is certainly contrary to what Kendo stands for.
